asweexplode (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} asweexplode) wrote,@ 2006-04-21 17:43:00 |
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It's funny, to lose something you thought you could never find. Something you thought would never come along because it wasn't meant for you. Something you thought you could never feel. Then you wake up one day, with their arm around you, protecting all the butterflies you've collected in your stomach. With their soft lips kissing yours, whispering sweet words, each one as genuine as the last and every one of them belonging to only you. And they say "I love you." And you say it back. Except it feels nothing like the way you've always imagined it would feel like to say it to someone for the first time. Because this time, it's real. And it's one of those moments when you realize that life has meaning. But more importantly, your life has meaning.
Then you wake up another day, and it's all gone. And all that's left is the silence, and the emptiness, and the tears you fall asleep with in the dark.
- - -
I spent a good amount of time wondering what else I could've done. But more and more I'm learning that all of this is beyond me. I could've given you the world, but it's not what you need. And whatever it is that you do need, it's not in me right now. One half of me hangs to the hope that you'll find your way back. And the other half wants to erase you completely from my mind, like they do so easily in Hollywood films. But this is no movie and it's no fairy tale. Just the reality of how cruel the world can be.
No one else in this whole world has ever given me what you have. No one's ever cared the way you did. No one else has ever come close to knowing me. And as much as all of this hurts, I still have nothing but love for you. But sometimes love isn't enough. And I do believe it isn't right now for us.
Seven whole days without you. All I have to hang on to are pieces. But beyond all my selfishness, there is still that greater hope that you find whatever it is you're looking for. And hopefully that you find happiness along the way. And maybe one day soon, the scars will heal and we can start something new again. Something much better than what's in front of us. Where there's no heartaches, no doubts, no fears. Where insects can crawl in people's ears, and we can call it love.
It's funny, to lose something you thought you could never find. Something you thought would never come along because it wasn't meant for you. Something you thought you could never feel. Then you wake up one day, with their arm around you, protecting all the butterflies you've collected in your stomach. With their soft lips kissing yours, whispering sweet words, each one as genuine as the last and every one of them belonging to only you. And they say "I love you." And you say it back. Except it feels nothing like the way you've always imagined it would feel like to say it to someone for the first time. Because this time, it's real. And it's one of those moments when you realize that life has meaning. But more importantly, your life has meaning. Then you wake up another day, and it's all gone. And all that's left is the silence, and the emptiness, and the tears you fall asleep with in the dark.
I spent a good amount of time wondering what else I could've done. But more and more I'm learning that all of this is beyond me. I could've given you the world, but it's not what you need. And whatever it is that you do need, it's not in me right now. One half of me hangs to the hope that you'll find your way back. And the other half wants to erase you completely from my mind, like they do so easily in Hollywood films. But this is no movie and it's no fairy tale. Just the reality of how cruel the world can be.
No one else in this whole world has ever given me what you have. No one's ever cared the way you did. No one else has ever come close to knowing me. And as much as all of this hurts, I still have nothing but love for you. But sometimes love isn't enough. And I do believe it isn't right now for us.
Seven whole days without you. All I have to hang on to are pieces. But beyond all my selfishness, there is still that greater hope that you find whatever it is you're looking for. And hopefully that you find happiness along the way. And maybe one day soon, the scars will heal and we can start something new again. Something much better than what's in front of us. Where there's no heartaches, no doubts, no fears. Where insects can crawl in people's ears, and we can call it love.
